scatteredthoughts.

The Weekend: was not what I thought it was going to be.

the reason I look so scared is because I was terrified of the idea of taking a picture at a goldwater game.haha. but B wanted to. so this was the outcome. :]

I went down to p-town because B was going. But as it turned out we hardly hung out. :[

But I did see so much of my family this weekend. It was refreshing and amazing.

And caught up with some friends I have not talked to in too long. and of course church. It was good.

Now I am back up here in the mountains. thinking. don't you hate when that happens?

Things feel backwards but I don't know why...
I am happy but I feel like so much is missing. maybe it is just me missing things or people or situations..but it feels like more then that.

That doesn't make sense..

I love this little girls. They are so beautiful and they are growing up so fast. my cousins (and aunts) are more like my brothers and sisters. and I miss them. :[ my life is happiest when we all are together. I cannot wait til Christmas. :]

(ps. Delaney doesn't really have pink hair. she just found some fun hairspray.)

I am going to focus on focusing for a little while.

"You're altogether lovely altogether worthy altogether wonderful to me. "

love.

enough.

"You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough"
every time I fall down I am reminded.
tonight it was in the form of a simple younglife song and laughter and love.
I am alive and all that You are is more than enough reason for me to be joyful in every way.
I love being reminded of how much I love.

I truly believe that God knows exactly what he is doing and that as cliche as it is things do happen for a reason.
and that sometimes that reason is beyond our comprehension. But I have faith and I trust Him.
my grandma always says, "God draws straight with crocked lines." and I believe she is right.
we may not be able to see the whole picture right now but one day we will stand back and see what a beautiful thing it truly is.


I am in the best mood I have been in days and I love it.
And I love. and love and love.
:] I owe it all to You.

for sure.

I want to dedicate myself to a cause in which I believe,
and lose myself in spiritual service.
can I make that my major?

French:
textos = text messages
french texto slang is the coolest thing since silced bread. no joke.
A+ = A plus tard.
Bap = Bon apres-midi.
C pa 5pa = c'est pas sympa!
Dak = D'accord.
GT o 6ne = J'etait au cine.
Kestufe? = Qu'est ce que tu fais?
Komencava? = Comment ca va?
Je t'M = Je t'aime.
the last two are my favorite. expect to see these in my textos from now on :]

so it is freezing. literally the ground is ice. oh gezz. :]

thankful.

Words cannot describe how thankful I am that God has blessed me with the friendship of these girls.(plus Meigen)(WHO IS COMING BACK HOME FOR GOOD!)

They are my support system. They always make it better. No matter what.

We laugh even when things aren't funny. We can finish each others thoughts and we have fun doing the lamest things.Nothing is ever too serious, or too stupid, to discuss.

Our lives seem to always fit together and relate.

It seems like we continue to get closer even though we are farther away.

I love them so much. And I wish we went to school together.

It gets harder to come back to these mountains every time I see them.

This WEEKEND.
which of course was another Phoenix weekend (for the most part.)

Saturday I went to the football game, unfortunately I didn't get to watch it. :[

I worked a concession stand with the service jacks. whooo. It was pretty fun and brought back memories of AMC.

I left straight from there to make that quite familiar two hour drive. (which gets longer EVER time)

Then I showered and headed to dinner. We ate and spilled our guts. then we went to "the coolest spot in Glendale" which I wasn't really aware was that cool until everyone decided that is where they are going to hang out from now on. We decided we will probably run into each other on dates there. awkward. And just so it is on record somewhere I was the first one. well and Meigen too, but it was my idea. Anyway the plan was star watching (which B and I are currently in love with) unfortunately it was cloudy so it turned into cloud watching and of course more spilling of guts. Then Taylor went home and the three of us decided, after much uncertainty, against Tempe parties and started in our search for a bathroom for peesalotRachel. After we went to the always-open Walmart the fun began. We, well I, decided we shouldn't talk about it though. But I can tell you it was FUNFUNFUN. And I can also tell you it wasn't a one time thing. We will definitely be doing that again soon. maybe in a different location though. :]

PS. if you ever want to make B or Rachel's lives miserable or thoroughly entertain yourself put a cockroach within five feet of them.

The rest of the weekend was spent uneventfully.

The doctor poked me, asked if that hurt or that, and took some blood. In two weeks I get to do some more tests.

Maybe there isn't anything wrong and my stomach really just doesn't like food?

currently

this song explains everything...

"Sitting here, on this lonely dock

Watch the rain play on the ocean top

All the things I feel I need to say

I can't explain in any other way

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too

Now here's the sun, come to dry the rain
Warm my shoulders and relieve my pain
You're the one thing that I'm missing here
With you beside me I no longer fear

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too

I could have saved so much time for us
Had I seen the way to get to where I am today
You waited on me for so long
So now, listen to me say:

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too."

get it?

superrachel.

My best friend really is super. just watch...

I told you! hahaaaa. She's so cool!

delicious.

Just to let you know, I am in love.

With honey whole wheat bagels with peanut butter.

Maybe it is because this is the first thing I have eaten in a good forty hours.

BUT SERIOUSLY in the words of Meigen "It's like Jesus dancing in my mouth!"

food is delicious. I love it.

Speaking of delicious. :]

HAha I had to. mmmm.