hey bestfriends.

just to let you know, I am have officially declared my major. :]
My major is officially elementary education with an emphasis on bilingual multicultural education.

so one day I will be able to teach kids all over the world.
haaahaaa. :]


Happy Halloweeeeen.

serious.

just in case you all didn't believe me...

this came a couple days ago.

that's grandma, aunt holly, aunt laurel,

delaney, savannah, and yes molly.

hahaaa.

I love my family.

I get to hang out with them this weekend. :]

and MEIGEN! I am go glad she is coming home.

dinner.

seriously that's what I had for dinner.

my mom would be so proud of me.

underwhere?

I write too many blogs.
even though I now have my own playlist I still listen to Meigen's when I type.


"the hardest thing to let go of is the people you care about." - scrubs.
Yeah I did just quote something from scrubs. :]
I think that show is the perfect amount of humor and seriousness.


I hate this feeling and I just want it to go away and never return.
I don't want to make it a big deal if it isn't but it just feels so big to me.
I have noticed though that these days do go by quite quickly lately.



Normal?



In my family there is this "game" that developed with the invention of camera phones.
It doesn't necessarily have a name or definite rules. But basically when you receive a picture of someone wearing underwear on their head you must return a picture of yourself wearing underwear on your head (in addition to sending it to all the other players) whoever returns their picture to the original sender first wins. in the beginning the rules were much stricter for example the underwear on your head had to be yours and you had to send it back within fifteen minutes of receiving...however that proved to be difficult. so we are pretty flexible now a days. hahaaa. Anyway there are always pictures of someone wearing underwear on their head on my phone. (in case you ever find them and wonder.)(and don't worry the underwear is always clean.) (for the record if you know my family you know something like this is in no way even close to weird for us.) (scary, huh?)
*those camo underwear are actually boys boxer briefs. they came in the pack with the pairs for our batman and robin costumes.
they're sweet.
I own at the this game. :]
I have been known to include innocent family pets, stuffed animals (yes Meigen, Bluebeary), and even young cousins.




Oh and I learned today that wind (FREEZING WIND) is my new worst enemy. it makes walking to class miserable.

me & myself.

I am going to copy Meigen...sorta.
(stupid blog always reformats my posts. and I don't have the energy to fix it.)

I listen to the music on Meigen's blog when I type on my own blog.

I bought cherry chapstick because B had it. And I am in love.

I am going to be batman for halloween.

and Rachel is going to be robin.

jealous?

I love the french language.

and french music.

I feel guilty on days that I don't work out.

like today.

sometimes I use this blog to organize my thoughts.

which is why I delete.

When I say "my family" I mean my sister, mom, cousins, aunts, & grandparents.

At the moment my ideal 24 hours would be spent laughing with "my family" all day.

and then heading to "the coolest spot ever" and star watching with the four best girls I know.

I only get sad when I think about stuff.

which is why I try not to.

sometimes I wish I was a boy.

because I think life would be easier.

I think I am happier than other people think I am.

I get stressed out when I think about having to tell certain people I don't want them to be in my wedding.

I also get stressed when I think about paying for France.

If I had a choice it would be summer all year long.

and I would be a summer intern at church.

I always fall asleep half way through my night time prays

and then I feel bad.

I want to travel the entire world.

I want to dedicate myself to a cause in which I believe

and lose myself in spiritual service.

for the rest of forever.

Sometimes I get discouraged. and I feel like Ingrid Michaelson's song.

Keep Breathing.

I always relate songs to my current situation.

and my life in general.

I always feel better after I take a nap.

Sometimes the thought of the rest of my life scares me.

like crazy.

I believe I am currently learning that the only one I truly need is You.

and that is because I am finally starting to let myself realize that I don't need you.

and I can't tell if that makes me happy or sad.

I truly believe God has a plan.
I just wish I understood it.

I also believe He brings people into my life to teach me things.

sometimes maybe it is simply how to stand up for myself.

or how to let go.

I like memories.

I think about them a lot.

This whole college thing still doesn't feel like my real life.

I hate not having a "home."

I am learning that I am important too.

and sometimes I need to stop taking care of others

and stat taking care of myself.

I have discovered that honesty and the truth are really important to me.

I think that is enough for now.

It is officially MEIGEN AMANDA VILLAsoRREAL's 19th (she's old. :] )Birthday! call her, text her, love her.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I love you to pieces.

:]

scatteredthoughts.

The Weekend: was not what I thought it was going to be.

the reason I look so scared is because I was terrified of the idea of taking a picture at a goldwater game.haha. but B wanted to. so this was the outcome. :]

I went down to p-town because B was going. But as it turned out we hardly hung out. :[

But I did see so much of my family this weekend. It was refreshing and amazing.

And caught up with some friends I have not talked to in too long. and of course church. It was good.

Now I am back up here in the mountains. thinking. don't you hate when that happens?

Things feel backwards but I don't know why...
I am happy but I feel like so much is missing. maybe it is just me missing things or people or situations..but it feels like more then that.

That doesn't make sense..

I love this little girls. They are so beautiful and they are growing up so fast. my cousins (and aunts) are more like my brothers and sisters. and I miss them. :[ my life is happiest when we all are together. I cannot wait til Christmas. :]

(ps. Delaney doesn't really have pink hair. she just found some fun hairspray.)

I am going to focus on focusing for a little while.

"You're altogether lovely altogether worthy altogether wonderful to me. "

love.

enough.

"You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough"
every time I fall down I am reminded.
tonight it was in the form of a simple younglife song and laughter and love.
I am alive and all that You are is more than enough reason for me to be joyful in every way.
I love being reminded of how much I love.

I truly believe that God knows exactly what he is doing and that as cliche as it is things do happen for a reason.
and that sometimes that reason is beyond our comprehension. But I have faith and I trust Him.
my grandma always says, "God draws straight with crocked lines." and I believe she is right.
we may not be able to see the whole picture right now but one day we will stand back and see what a beautiful thing it truly is.


I am in the best mood I have been in days and I love it.
And I love. and love and love.
:] I owe it all to You.